A Muse with a View

After a year on hiatus, the political talk show To the point! is back. These are the topics we discussed on the last show. I just checked the website and the shows haven’t been uploaded, but check back in about a week or so at http://www.tothepointtv.org.

In this photo from left to right: Richard Donin, Matt Wingard, Kelly Jo Horton, Courtney Clarke, Mike Riley.

Panelists for these two shows were:

Richard Donin, Energy and Educational Consultant
Al Young, former Oregon State Legislator
and guest panelists Courtney Clarke, a local business owner
and Jack Ohman, Editorial Cartoonist for the Oregonian

Show 1:
First: International
On January 12th, the worst earthquake in 200 years struck less than 10 miles from the city of Port-au-Prince, Haiti, turning an already impoverished nation into a pile of rubble. Many have compared the disaster in Haiti to the devastation of hurricane Katrina in New Orleans, but you can’t really compare a regional disaster to an entire country in pieces, or can you? When the cameras stop rolling and the celebrities stop raising money for Haiti, will they be able to recover and how long will it take?

Second: National
Toyota Motor Corporation has been criticized for its initial response to the consumer complaints of unintended acceleration in some of its vehicles. In a recent hearing before the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee California State Representative Henry A. Waxman, chairman of the Energy and Commerce Committee, said Toyota had three responses to the consumer complaints: First, blame the driver. Second, blame the floor mat. Third, blame a sticky gas pedal. Toyota has now recalled more than eight million vehicles world-wide for unintended acceleration, brake problems and other issues. Is it too little too late, and have they damaged the brand loyalty?

Third: Statewide
Oregon voters recently passed Measures 66 and 67, which were supposed to prevent further layoffs in the public school system and fund public services. Since the measures became law some local businesses have closed due to the retroactive taxes owed, and schools are still being asked to make cuts. Did the voters really know what they were voting for, and where did all of the money go?

Fourth: Local
As we sit here and tape this show, the Metro Council is discussing the urban growth boundary, and voting on agreements with the three Portland-area counties to designate which land will be developed and which will remain rural for the next 40 to 50 years. Should Metro be picking the winners and losers, and will these property owners have any recourse if they want to but can’t develop their land?

Show 2:

First: International
U.N. Climate Chief Yvo de Boer recently resigned after four years of leading international climate change negotiations. Some say it was due to the chaos of the Copenhagen summit last year, and the fact that the summit quickly became known as Climate-gate after 1,000 suspicious emails between climate scientists were leaked to the public. Will these scientists ever be able to regain the trust of the global community, and will the world’s largest polluters be motivated to change now?

Second: National
President Obama’s healthcare bill seems to be losing steam, with the recent departure of some supporters on the Democratic side of the aisle. Does President Obama have what it takes to convince the House and Senate to pass some sort of healthcare reform, or has his window of opportunity passed?

Third: Statewide
(I had to write this topic five minutes before the show because the previous topic was outdated by the time I drove to the studio!) We discussed the future of the newspaper industry, given the fact that the Oregonian had laid off 37 people the week we taped the show, and the fact that we had Jack Ohman on the show to discuss the topic.

Fourth: Local
The City of Portland is taking unspent money from the Big Pipe waste-water project, to use for other purposes, such as bike paths. The Willamette Week newspaper has documented other cases where the City of Portland is taking money collected for one purpose and using it for other purposes. Are these the kind of decisions Portland officials were elected to make?

The picture below was taken by Scott James in the summer of 2009. It is a modeling shot, but what makes it unique? There were 50 other models dressed in the same type of white tank top getting their picture taken as well. This is something you rarely see in the modeling industry: no makeup, no hair products, no Photoshop.

Many agencies outside Portland require a totally natural shot like this. They want to see the model beneath the makeup, the bare canvas. And who wouldn’t?

This is my “Jamie Lee Curtis” shot, only I’m not in my underwear. Please know that my first reaction upon seeing this photo—for the first time today—was to want to “fix” the picture. But resisted, I did.

And I love it!

Forty eight years ago today my mom put down her cup of coffee, stubbed out her cigarette, looked at my dad, and said, “It’s time.”

That was the first Facebook status I posted on my forty-eighth birthday earlier this week. I don’t know if it’s true, but knowing my mom, I’m sure it is. In fact I’m pretty sure she finished the cigarette before she went to the hospital.

Many of you have inquired as to my whereabouts over the past two months, so I thought I’d update you. I checked out from the public spotlight for a couple of months. Okay that’s a bit of a lie. I worked like a dog. That’s the truth.

Excuse #1: Working Like a Dog

I work in the field of interactive television. I am in a small group of people who deploy the hardware and software that supports all of the interactive applications my company has running at any given time. Well, for the past few months we have been ramping up to launch two major appllications. First an app for the Olympics on the NBC cable channels (MSNBC, CNBC and USA). This required lots of prep and being on call 24/7 during the Olympics. I can’t say much here, but let’s just say this one went out to about 13 million cable households.

Second, I was the lead support person for a Showtime Boxing app that launched last week. So I spent many nights testing that app on a live channel while you all were sleeping. :^) I spent last Friday night actually on the phone with everyone involved while we watched the app playout during a live MMA match. This was an incredible moment, because this was the first app ever to play out nationally on HD.

This is what I do for a living. This is what the app looks like on Showtime:

http://www.sho.com/site/itv.do

Excuse #2: Exes

Enough said. Let’s just say I see my attorney way too often.

Excuse #3: Kids

Demanding little buggers!

Excuse #4: Real Life

In the past two months I have been bowling with a little Yeti figure, spent time with an Italian tutor/friend, been to the Kink Live Performance Lounge a few times, discovered some great bands around town, survived a layoff, instigated Narcissist Thursdays (which is sometimes held on Saturdays), auditioned for Leverage (the TNT series), changed agents (now with OMM for modeling and film), gone swing dancing for the first time in years, kissed a stranger on New year’s Eve (He was hot!), started doing my TV show again after a year off, rediscovered the library.

Promise #1: I can’t Not Write

I love to write. It feeds my soul. I just don’t know what form that will take. This website will stay and my blogs will be here. I may also continue to write for The Portlander. We shall see.

Yeti Bowling

To the Point TV show

So You Want to be a Thug?
Ever been told you look like a criminal? Well now’s your chance to take that to the bank. Casting Director Lana Veenker wants to train you up to become a Leverage thug. TNT’s Leverage employed over 120 local actors and more than 800 local background artists last season, and many of those people are not eligible to be featured again in Season 3. Veenker wants to make sure we have enough thugs to go around for the new episodes, which begin filming in Portland in March. If you are big and burly (you don’t have to be tall), and want to try your hand as a thug or a stunt person, check out Veenker’s Leverage Thug Boot Camp, taking place the weekend of February 6th and 7th. For more details and registration info, see the Leverage Boot Camp website and Veenker’s Casting Scoop blog.

OMM and Arthouse Agencies Branch Out
Two of Portland’s powerhouse talent agencies, OMM (Option Model Management) and Arthouse, recently announced they are both branching out to become full service agencies. The two agencies used to work as an unofficial team, with OMM booking talent for the print side of the house and Arthouse booking the film and commercial roles. Each agency is now booking talent for both the print and film jobs, which we hope is a win-win for the growing film industry in Portland.

Wake Before I Die is first i-OPIF Production
In 2009, the Oregon legislature passed SB863, which created the “Indigenous Oregon Production Investment Fund” (i-OPIF). The fund provides rebates of  “20% of goods and services and 10% of Oregon labor for films produced by Oregon filmmakers who spend a minimum of $75,000 but not more than $750,000 on their project.”  The fund began taking applications the first week of January, and the Freeman Brothers (Todd and Jason) must have been first in line, because their production of the feature film Wake Before I Die is the first to utilize the fund.
The script for the film is an adaptation of Dale Freeman’s novel My Soul To Take. Oh, and did I mention Dale Freeman is Todd and Jason’s father? Truly a family affair. Wake Before I Die is currently in production, and is a collaboration of the Freeman brothers, produced by Robert Blanche.

CON-Con the Leverage Fanatic Convention
What started out as a relatively small fan gathering has turned into a full-fledged Leverage convention. The CON-con is on! Leverage fans from around the world are planning to converge on Portland the weekend of March 19-21, to meet and greet their fellow fans, and get a chance to rub elbows with the Leverage cast. The event kicks off on Friday, March 19th, with a TNT-hosted CON-con Cocktail Party at The Governor Hotel. Prices for events start at $25 (to attend the cocktail party) and go up to $300 for the complete Platinum package. Registration information available on the CON-con website.

The Casting Couch
Commercial spots recently booked: Bissel, RAID, Nike, Mellow Yellow. Casting happening now: Microsoft, Nike, Oil Can Henry’s, an indie film called Thumbdrive, a SAG short called Beat Red with Mike Farrell (M.A.S.H) and Doug Rowe. Jobs are up 35% from this time last year. We love that!

Job Board
TNT’s Leverage is seeking to fill the following crew positions: Location Sound Mixer, “B” Camera Operator, and Personal Assistant/Production Assistant. See the Oregon Film Board website for details.

I am a bit of a music snob. What I mean by that is when I see live music I like to be within a few feet of the band so I can get the full experience. I am not going to pay a lot of money for seats in the attic when I could get that experience listening to a CD at home. No, I want to see them sweat.

And I have no tolerance for bands who suck live. I don’t want you to sound all produced like you do on your CD, but you’d better have some stage presence and know how to play those things you call instruments.

As an actress, I know how it feels to be really good but never make it. No one will ever know you’re any good if they never get the chance to see you work your magic. It is the same in the music industry. Plenty of great bands never get heard.

There is a local DJ named Greg on 94.7 KNRK. On a recent trip to the UK he came across a band called The Twang, and somehow convinced  them they should come visit Portland. Take a vacation! Come see the beautiful Pacific Northwest! So they did. Not only did they come to Portland on vacation, but they played a FREE show at The Woods (a former funeral parlor) in Sellwood, and they used borrowed instruments. And this was their first real show in the U.S.

I got to The Woods at 6pm on Friday when the doors opened, and found a line had already formed. I showed my I.D. (yes, they carded everyone), got my wrist stamp, and immediately procured a cocktail from the makeshift bar: a card table adorned with a bottle of vodka, gin, tequila, mixers, and a metal cash box. I had had a very stressful afternoon at work, and had been looking forward to a vodka and soda with a lime since about 4pm. I took a long draw on the straw, took a look around and waited for my friends to arrive.

The stage area was at the far end of what must have been the room where services were originally held when the place was a funeral parlor. In fact, the stage was right where the casket would have been had we all been there for a viewing instead of a concert. Creepy in a cool way.

My friend Peter was the first of my friends to show up, and I dragged him straight to the front of the “stage” and set my purse down right next to one of the amps.

“You’re such a groupie,” he said.

“Hey, you’ll thank me later,” I said, somehow knowing this band was going to be good, really good. “Mark my words. This is the last time you’ll ever see them in a venue this size.”

You see The Twang play to stadium-size crowds in the UK. They play at festivals and open for bands like Oasis. And here we were, seeing them in the “living room” of a funeral parlor for free!

The room quickly started to fill up. Right around 7pm, Greg (from KNRK) came up and introduced the band. The crowd crushed up, the band started to play, and I knew from the first bar that this little concert was going to be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

My friends Joe and Jeff showed up somewhere around the second or third song and said they were the last two people to get in. They had started to turn people away at the door. The place was packed.

I’m not sure who to compare The Twang to, but Elvis Costello and a few other bands come to mind.

At one point someone in the crowd yelled out, “Do a Beatles cover!” to which the lead singer Phil replied, “How about if I just cover you with my fucking beer?!”

I love these guys. They are The Twang from Birmingam, England. The CD I bought at the show was well worth the $10. Go see them if you get a chance. As they say in Birmingham, fucking brilliant!

Going through life with ADD is like experiencing every moment through the lens of a video camera operated by a 5-year old.

That is the only way I can describe it to someone who does not have ADD.

Imagine going through your day trying to focus on a task, but looking through a camera that is constantly focusing on other things in the room. That’s what it’s like. You constantly struggle to keep the camera focused on the task at hand, and you fight the urge to move it.

The truth is my brain makes connections at warp speed, which makes me very good at what I do in my day job, but makes it extremely difficult for me to focus on any one thing for any length of time.

According to Dr. Daniel Amen, ADD is the result of an understimulated prefrontal cortex. This is the area of the brain responsible for sending inhibitory signals to other parts of the brain to settle down. If it were the video camera it would be the stabilizer feature and the tri-pod all in one.

I have tried many of the ADD drugs on the market.

The Amphetamine Group: Ritalin, Adderall, Focalin, Vyvanse, Daytrana. These drugs stimulate the prefrontal cortex, which helps you focus, however, they are stimulants so the side effects can be feeling jittery and having horrible insomnia. Vyvanse turned me into a hyper focused, anti-social robot. I also think there’s a connection between Vyvanse and my frozen shoulder that is now finally healed after 18 months.

The one non-stimulant ADD drug: Strattera. I tried this one for five days and it made me so tired that I could barely function. However, it is the only thing I’ve tried that actually gave me a glimpse into the life of a person without ADD.  I felt a little bit like a Stepford Wife when I was on Strattera, but damn my house was starting to get organized! However, I felt like this drug dumbed-down my IQ by 20 points. This drug is also hella expensive if you don’t have insurance.

A non-ADD drug: Wellbutrin. This drug is often prescribed for mild depression, PMS, and for people who want to quit smoking. It is fairly mild, and makes you feel like you’re wearing rose-colored glasses. I am pretty sure there’s a connection between mild depression and ADD. The two generally go hand-in-hand because the constant sense of frustration that ADD people feel can lead to depression. Just my armchair analysis.

The problem with any drug is they all have side effects. I’m not talking about the medical side effects. I’m talking about the fact that they alter your personality. Every one of them made me feel like a less-creative version of myself. In fact I couldn’t have written the first sentence of this blog had I been on Strattera or Wellbutrin. I found that both of those drugs created too much space between my thoughts, thereby, preventing the creative connections I took for granted. It was like having a wet blanket on my wit!

I am constantly looking for alternatives to the daily struggle of being ADD. L-Tryptophan is next on my list of things to try. But until then I will continue to be the creative, moody ADD bitch you have all come to know and love. :^)

I can’t believe it’s been over a year since we last taped a To the Point TV show. I had been writing, co-producing and hosting this show for over three years when I decided to take a break last January. It was a lot of work for no pay. But it was always interesting and challenging.

Well, all good breaks must come to an end. We taped two back-to-back shows last night, and they will start airing in the Portland Metro area next week on channels 21 and 23 I think. They will be up on our website ToThePointTV.org in a week or two.

The panelists last night were:

State Representative Matt Wingard

Mike Riley, Riley Research

Richard Donin, Energy and Educational Consultant

and guest panelist Courtney Clarke, a local business owner.

International
The protests that began after President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s controversial re-election in June have grown into what some say is the biggest challenge to the government since the 1979 Islamic revolution. Just this week the government banned all citizens from cooperating with foreign organizations such as the BBC, Voice of America, and various human rights groups, saying these groups were trying to destabilize the government.  Who will prevail, Ahmadinejad or the people of Iran, and what if anything can the world community do?

National
On December 25th a suspected al-Qaeda member, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, got on Northwest Airlines flight 253 in Amsterdam and attempted to detonate a bomb during the flight’s final descent into Detroit. British intelligence had been tracking Abdulmutallab for more than a year, and Abdulmutallab’s father had warned U.S. intelligence of his son’s radical behavior six weeks prior to the incident. The U.S. has already announced it will require additional screening for air passengers bound for the U.S. from any of 14 countries, including Algeria, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia and Nigeria. But will this work?

State
According to the Cascade Policy Institute (a free market think tank), Measures 66 and 67 could cost Oregon up to 70,000 jobs. Opponents of the measure say we shouldn’t be increasing taxes during a recession and the government hasn’t tightened its belt enough.  Proponents say the tax is only on the wealthiest Oregonians and corporations and that schools and health care services will have to be cut if the tax increases don’t pass. Let’s talk about the key points in these measures.

Local
He’s a former Portland Trailblazer, a financial adviser, and a sometimes basketball and lacrosse coach in Lake Oswego. He’s Chris Dudley and he’s running for Governor. Can he win the  Republican nomination with a lot of financial backing but no political experience?

International

The country of Yemen is being torn apart by a tribal rebellion, a secessionist movement, and the worst poverty and unemployment in the Arab world. And al-Qaeda has been quick to take advantage of the chaos, and create a presence in Yemen. How can the U.S. be most effective in fighting this terrorist organization?

National

Both the Senate and the House have put forth legislation to pass a behemoth healthcare bill. Some argue the bill violates constitutional rights. Others say it doesn’t go far enough. Assuming the bill passes, what will be the most significant impacts on the average U.S. citizen?

State

According to an investigative report published in The Oregonian newspaper, the administration of Governor Ted Kulongoski misrepresented the true cost of a tax credit created to subsidize renewable energy, in order to get it passed by the State Legislature. Is the Business Energy Tax Program still a good program even with the additional costs?

Local

Economists say the state has technically climbed out of recession. but tell that to the 11.1% of Oregonians who are still unemployed. Tom Potiowsky, Oregon government’s chief economist says it’s a jobless recovery and it’s going to be a long, slow road. What is it going to take for Oregon to dig itself out of the recession?

As I was sitting around the table at Starbucks this morning with my running buddies of 15 years, there was a common theme in the conversation. We were all more than happy to kiss the last decade goodbye.

When I look back at the last 10 years I realize that I have been through every major life crisis imaginable. I went through a divorce. I lost my mom. I had cancer not once but twice (I’m five years clear now, knock wood).  I had to short sale a house I owned in L.A. I had to take a business partner to court. I was underemployed, and then unemployed. I ended the decade with a very destructive relationship.

We all watched our 401k plans shrink by half.

But even with all of that adversity I still saw the glass as half full. Every time I wanted to have a pity party I thought about the people who were worse off than me. I had a roof over my head. I wasn’t sleeping in my car or under a bridge. I survived cancer.  In 2008 I won my court battle. And in 2009 I sold that house in L.A. and landed an awesome job. And in the Spring of this year I vowed to never again accept anything less than integrity, honesty and mutual respect in a relationship.

We all change over time, but I feel like I had a major life makeover. I truly believe that if you never know adversity and sorrow you can’t really appreciate joy.

May this decade bring us all an abundance of friends, family, love and joy. Happy new year everyone.

I am a registered member of a dating site called OKCupid. One of the unique features of the site is you can write Journal entries, which I occasionally do. I posted the entry below a few days ago and I couldn’t believe how defensive some of the guys got. It was like I had personally attacked their masculinity with my simple tips on how to choose the right main profile photo.

Here’s the post:

Okay guys, listen up. I’m going to let you in on a couple of secrets about what goes through the mind of a woman when she looks at your profile and decides whether or not to read it or click the dreaded Hide button.

You have less than five seconds to catch our interest. This is the order in which most woman I know would notice things in your profile:

1. The first thing we look at is your MAIN photo.

2. The second thing is your screen name. Screen names like “PatheticLonelyGuy” and “Just4Sex” say a lot about who you are, how you feel about yourself, and what you’re looking for.

3. The three adjectives.

4. The first sentence in your profile (if we get that far).

Lesson 1: The Profile Picture

This is all about that very first picture we see. The rest of the photos shouldn’t follow all of these suggestions.

These are the DOs for your MAIN profile photo:

1. Headshot that clearly shows you from the shoulders up.

2. Smiling please. No one wants to date a sour puss.

3. Face the camera. No profiles.

4. Make sure the shot is in focus.

5. Recent photo.

6. Look directly into the camera. I realize I violated this with my original profile shot I had up, but there are exceptions to every rule.

These are the DON’Ts:

1. No hats. We want to see your hair or your chrome dome, as the case may be.

2. No sunglasses. We don’t trust you if we can’t see your eyes. How would you feel if you met a woman for a date and she never took off her sunglasses? Would you trust her.

3. Shot of you from far far away. Save that for the second or third photo.

4. No dead animals land or sea. A shot of you in a fishing hat and sunglasses holding up a dead fish does absolutely nothing to ignite the passions in a woman.

5. No photos of yourself in the bathroom. I take self shots a lot, but you’ll never see a bathroom mirror, shower stall or toilet in the background!

To be cont’d…

I started my week with a trip to the Doug Fir (one of my favorite live music venues) to see a little band called One Eskimo. I sent out an email the previous weekend trying to round up some friends to go, and I got a lot of responses saying things like, “I can’t make it because…” You fill in the blank.

I honestly didn’t care, because I was determined to go no matter what, even if I had to go alone. I had seen One Eskimo at the KINK Live Performance Lounge a few months back, and I wanted to come out to support them for the end of their U.S. tour. Besides, it is a kid-free week for me and I need to socialize!

My friend Michael ended up coming with me.

It was one of those really crappy rainy days that came on the heels of the deep freeze in Portland. We met at the Doug Fir bar upstairs a full three hours before the show was to start, and just ate dinner, had a drink and caught up.We hadn’t seen each other in person for many many months.

We finally walked down the stairway to the basement venue and it was almost totally empty. We stood around the bar, looked around the room, and decided that this would make the most awesome party room in a house.

People slowly started filtering in to see the first band whose name I couldn’t tell you because when they had the chance to introduce themselves the lead singer said, “Hi, we’re blesd leits. Thank you for coming.” Obviously their name is not “blesd leits,” but that’s what we heard.

Michael turned to the bartender and said, “What was their name?” The bartender pointed to the poster above the bar that said something with the word lights in it (I still don’t remember).

“What is with these bands and their mumbling?” I said. “They have this great opportunity to get their name out, and they wait until the end of the set to introduce themselves and then they totally blow it.”

“Believe me I know,” said the bartender. “I have seen a lot of bands from behind this bar, and there are three things I want to tell them. One, get some decent publicity shots. Two, Banter with the crowd, Three, say your name clearly and say it multiple times.” Amen!

The first band never talked to the “crowd,” except to self deprecate when they messed up a song.

When the band had finished their last song, and the crowd of about 50 people started to buzz again, Michael and I began to observe. There was a group of 20-something friends at some tables against the wall. A dreadlocked girl approached the table. One of her male friends turned to see her approaching and they both smiled with enthusiasm and embraced in an unabashed bear hug. They were not a couple. They were just friends who were happy to see each other. And not one of them was texting. They were there with each other, and fully present.

“What has happened to us?” I asked Michael. “Why don’t people our age have that much enthusiasm for each other?”

“I know,” he said. “They seem so naive and innocent.”

So what has happened to us? Have we let Facebook and Twitter replace our need for real human interaction? We put our most intimate emotional needs out their in a status update and hope someone will comment and fullfill that desire to feel needed and loved.

It’s a bandaid for a fatal disease. Real social intimicy is dying.

I struggle to get my friends to go out to hear live music, find a new restaurant, taste some new wine.

If the Internet died tomorrow, where would you be?

One Eskimo came on at 10pm, and I have to say I was a bit disappointed at their lack of interaction with the crowd as well. Very little eye contact, no banter. I enjoyed the music, but I enjoy it more when the band interacts with the audience, especially in a small venue like this where you can actually see the people you are playing for.

Even bands have forgotten how to be social.

I stayed afterwards to talk to one of the band members (Pete Rinaldi). We talked about the tour, the fact that they’ve been wearing the same clothes for a year, and how they’ve been stuffed in a decrepit van traveling the U.S. We talked about what it feels like to go home after you’ve been away for a while.

I think a lot of us have forgotten.

Unplug more often. Hug more often. Remember what it feels like to go home.